Saturday, June 25, 2011

Honda Tales, Part 1: How Kimber Came Into Accord With A Stranger After Locking Herself Out Of An Accord

I was an idiot the first time I used an ATM. I was sixteen and on my way to work,  a bank of all places, which might make you think I knew how to use an ATM. Wrong! If anything, my place of employment hindered my having a chance to learn the dark magic of the automatic teller machine because I worked with three other ladies who could do the same thing for me--no button-pushing required.

But on that fateful, chilly morning I needed cash for some reason, and I needed it before work. So I drove to the bank near our house and pulled up to the drive-through ATM. But I didn't pull in close enough to the machine, so like a dork I had to get out of my car and try to decode the workings of the ATM.

I was driving a slick '89 Honda Accord at the time, and that little hot rod didn't have automatic locks (or a passenger side mirror-awesome), so I got in the habit of locking my door as I exited in one fluid motion, my hand pulling the handle while my elbow clicked the little brown knob into the locked position. I did it every time I got out of the car; it was a reflex.

Not actually my car; perhaps a cousin.

A dangerous reflex ... after finally getting my cash, I turned to find my car locked, and running.

Meanwhile, a car had pulled up behind me (and the driver had presumably seen me using the ATM like a dweeb); it was driven by a middle-aged non-rapist-looking man. Upon realizing my predicament, he offered me a ride home, which I accepted, because when faced with the decision of either running home and being late to work or getting into a car with a stranger--guess what I'll go for? No stranger danger here. Besides, bad people just don't bank at Zion's Bank.

I did survive.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of Honda Tales, coming tomorrow.


  1. I have never even used an ATM - no wonder that was something I never taught you.
    Heck, I just barely learned how to take pictures with my phone - I know it can zoom, but I don't know how - and I haven't had time to read the 144 page manual. (not exaggerating)
    Hey, Nick's going to be driving that slick Honda pretty soon!

  2. I love you Kimber, you always have great stories :)

  3. The only problem with that picture of the honda is that one has hub caps and ours doesn't lol


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